Yesterday me and Mathias went to dinner at his parents place. It was very nice except for the part where I was really bummed out l, because his mother questioned whether I would be able to have a horse or not. Mathias told me that I was overreacting and hadn't understood what she meant when I talk to him about it when we got home. But the way I see it, when someone says "you have to make sure you really think about it" and "having both a job and a horse might very well be too much" and "how will you be able to do this..?" I think there's only one way I can interpret it.

What irritates me the most is the fact that it doesn't seem like people think that I have thought about it. I have spent a year planning for this, thinking about it, analyzing it... What; those people think that I just one day, like a week ago, suddenly woke up and said "oh Im gonna buy a horse! This will be so nice and lovely and easy and I love horses hihihi"

And for fucks sake, if it doesn't work out, I will stop. But fear is sooo not a reason not to try things.


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